During this difficult week, seeing the shocking images in Haiti, some people were glued to the TV and some avoided watching altogether. I am a checker. I feel the need to know and be connected with what is going on, but in small doses.

I find myself startled that now most news crews have gone home and we are back to Senator Brown, Tiger Woods’ rehab, and illegitimate children of famous men.

How can I stay connected and not go back to business as usual. And why do I want to? There is something in my Jewish roots that holds that it is important to know what is going on in the world, to not ignore other people’s suffering.

And then there is a spiritual challenge to not shy away from horror but to be a witness and keep my heart open. My years as a therapist, working with survivors of sexual abuse, have taught me the importance of being a compassionate witness in the healing process.

The Self-energy that we develop in the IFS process enhances our capacity for compassion. As we learn compassion for our parts, our heart opens and we have more ability to be aware of other people’s pain without being overwhelmed by it.

I have often found the Buddhist practice of tonglen useful. It allows you to breath in other’s suffering and then release it with compassion through your heart.

The events in Haiti are the latest example of the way our world asks us to stay open-hearted and take whatever action we can while balancing this connectedness with self-care.