Self-Therapy for Your
Inner Critic
Jay Earley, PhD, and Bonnie Weiss, LCSW
If you have already purchased the book and you need support with the practices click here.
If you have already purchased the book and you need support with the practices click here.
Do you struggle with bouts of depression and low self-esteem? Do you feel ashamed or guilty or hopeless at times? Take heart—this book offers a solution. Based on Internal Family Systems Therapy (IFS) a powerful form of psychotherapy, Self-Therapy for Your Inner Critic can help you put an end to your painful feelings and help you grow into the person you’ve always dreamed of being. The surprising and wonderful news is that many people can achieve this transformation on their own, without the intervention of a psychotherapist. It’s time for your suffering to end because you can transform your life.
The Inner Critic is the part of you that judges you, demeans you, and tells you who you should be. It undermines your self-confidence and makes you feel bad about yourself. Since this is one of the most difficult and tenacious issues that people face, we have written this book to show you how to transform your Inner Critic using IFS.
Our core understanding is that self-esteem is your birthright. You deserve to feel good about yourself without having to earn it. Yet we’ve all had the experience of feeling bad about ourselves. Think of those times when you felt down and believed that you were worthless, stupid, incompetent, etc. That wasn’t the truth about you; it was a message from your Inner Critic.
What Makes This Book So Powerful
There isn’t just one Inner Critic part; most people have a number of self-judging protectors that operate in different ways. This book identifies seven types of Inner Critics with different motivations and strategies for controlling you.
When you go inside and actually get to know your Inner Critic using IFS, it’s surprising to learn that it is actually trying to help you (even though it is really causing trouble). This makes it possible to make a personal connection with your Critic and turn it into an ally rather than fighting it. Self-Therapy for Your Inner Critic contains the details of exactly how to transform each of the seven Inner Critics through IFS.
Another exciting and hopeful outcome of the book: We have discovered that you can develop an aspect of your Self that we call the Inner Champion, which supports and encourages you. It is a magic bullet for dealing with the negative impacts of your Inner Critics. The adage “You can love yourself” is not just a platitude. Our book shows you how to do exactly that. Therefore you aren’t stuck with the anguish and difficulties that stem from your Inner Critic. Your inner world can change so that you feel confident and capable, allowing your life journey to unfold in an exciting way.
Foreword by James Flaherty
For everyone I know, including myself, the inncer critic causes unnecessary suffering, smothers initiative, wreaks havoc in relationships, and defeats change efforts. It's easy to locate--simply pay attention when you try something new, prepare for an important activity, or get introduced to a potential date or employer, and the critic will show up in full force. Undoubtedly you know what I’m talking about.
Distinguishing the critic is an essential first step in being able to intervene in its awkward, painful interruptions of our plans, self-development, and interactions with others. This extraordinarily helpful book—using transcripts from real conversations, playful illustrations, checklists, and questionnaires—makes taking this first step a sure and accurate one for any reader.
What to do once we find the critic? Ah, there’s the rub. Criticizing our critic doesn’t help; giving in to it diminishes us; trying to fight with it tangles us up in endless struggle. Here’s where the book’s real power comes into play. The authors, both deeply experienced in Internal Family Systems Therapy, clearly show a step-by-step process of diminishing the critic’s power and transforming it into an ally through psychological alchemy, which is at the heart of their therapeutic method. They’ve found the perfect balance point by writing a book that isn’t too dense in theory to be useful and isn’t too superficial to have much lasting impact.
The inner critic is often disguised, defended, and deeply enmeshed within us in contradictory thoughts, feelings, and sensations. In a further sign of the authors’ true mastery of the topic, they make this confusing bundle of reactions clear and accessible.
The book also shows how we can gain access to parts of ourselves that can bring encouragement, continuous learning and self-correction to our most important activities and relationships. As a consequence, readers can develop themselves into someone with much greater confidence and independence of thought and action.
Please jump into this book and take on its activities, at first for yourself; they will bring you immediate relief and learning. Then, if you’re someone who works with others, bring the book’s practical wisdom to your clients. They will be grateful, well served, and left with much greater self-knowledge and competence.
With gratitude, respect, and admiration for Jay and Bonnie, I wholeheartedly recommend you bring your full commitment and dedication to this book.
James Flaherty
Founder of New Ventures West, Integral Coaching®
Author of Coaching:
Evoking Excellence in Others
A detailed down-to-earth framework to help transform inner criticism.
In my work with people in a contemplative context, I have found self-judgment and harsh self-criticism to be pervasive, and often paralyzing and debilitating. Jay Earley and Bonnie Weiss have given us a detailed and elegant, yet down-to-earth, framework to help transform such inner criticism. What particularly distinguishes this very helpful book from many others is their understanding of the protective function of the inner critic in its many forms, how the inner critic is not ultimately the “enemy,” but can rather, with inner work, become an inner “champion” and mentor. With numerous examples of individuals’ successful work with the inner critic, sparkling insights throughout the book, and their clear charting of a path of healing and transformation, Earley and Weiss have provided a very valuable and accessible resource, one that I will recommend to my students.
Donald Rothberg, Ph.D.
Spirit Rock Meditation Center, Woodacre, California
Get Started With Self-Therapy
for Your Inner Critic
You can purchase Self-Therapy for Your Inner Critic in two formats:
You can purchase a physical paperback book from Amazon.com or directly from this website.
Or you can purchase a digital eBook format that you can instantly download to your computer for $9.95.
Whichever you prefer, select your preference below and click "Order Now".
Key guideposts for the inner explorer.
Jay and Bonnie have pioneered in bringing IFS out of therapy offices and into people's daily lives. This book contains key guideposts for the inner explorer in terms of what to expect when engaging inner critics… I can fully endorse this most recent contribution to their important project of popularizing IFS.
Richard Schwartz, PhD
Author of Internal Family Systems Therapy and
creator of IFS
The new bible of self-tranformation.
Jay Earley and Bonnie Weiss's remarkable book will lead you beyond survival and old adaptations and into a life free from the confines of the past. Our Inner Critics are, after all, a way of protecting our inner exiles from further pain, suffering, humiliation and shame. This Critic book shows the path of transforming our Critics to have new roles in our psyche. Self Therapy for Your Inner Critic and it's companion volume, Self-Therapy, could be called the New Bible of Self-Transformation. They give a detailed map to support you in unfolding an adventure of healing—allowing for your flowering, fullness, and joy in living.
Paula Smith-Hamilton
LCSW PhD, Davis CA
Enormous potential for healing!
Reading Self-Therapy for Your Inner Critic has been a treat! As a pastor and a psychoanalyst who uses IFS more and more, I appreciate this book as a resource with enormous potential for healing in a place where so many people suffer—the assaults of their Inner Critic. Its clarity about the different types of Critics was edifying, and the exercises were easy to practice. While reading the book, I was able to become more acquainted with my own Critic parts in a deepening way. Weiss and Earley have made an important contribution to the endeavor of refining the application of IFS to a wider audience. I look forward to using this material in both the therapy office and classroom.
Ann M. Akers
M.Div, LP, NCPsyA, New York City
Taken inner critic work to a whole new level!
Bonnie Weiss and Jay Earley have created a window into how our psyche works using the IFS method. They show we can befriend our inner critic and the parts that judge ourselves and others. Since John Bradshaw’s work, we have become familiar with our inner child; Voice Dialogue helped us make friends with our inner critic. But this was just the beginning of exploring myself; Weiss and Earley have taken it to a whole new level. Their books, classes and workshops have helped myself and others to love ourselves using IFS’s kind and gentle philosophy and method. It has been informative, entertaining, and fun to get to know my inner critic and discover that it actually has my best interests at heart.
Eleanor Karn
Artist, Writer, Lawyer, Meditator, Walnut Creek, CA
Extremely helpful, both personally and professionally.
This valuable book describes a fresh way of working with our Inner Critics through the Internal Family Systems therapeutic approach. The authors explore the human tendency to repeatedly undermine and damage our self-esteem. Instead of treating the Inner Critic as pathological, they describe and illustrate a positive strategy for transforming it that will appeal to many people. I have found it extremely helpful, both personally and professionally.
Esther S. Battle
Ph.D., Yellow Springs, OH
Sharply drawn vignettes and insightful exercises.
This book is the next step in applying Internal Family Systems therapy. It gives you an innovative approach to working with your Internal Critic, illustrated by sharply drawn vignettes and insightful exercises. You will learn in detail how to embrace your Internal Critic so that it becomes an ally in reweaving your internal landscape.
Cathy G. Duke
Psychotherapist, Atlanta, GA
Powerful, accessible toos for transforming the inner critic.
Jay and Bonnie have done a tremendous job of not only demystifying the Inner Critic but also providing readers with powerful, accessible tools for transforming it into a positive force in the personality. Their work is a rich contribution to Internal Family Systems and an important source of healing for everyone fortunate enough to experience it.
Kira Freed
M.A., IFS Life Coach, Tucson, AZ
An entire tool box of tests, forms, ideas, and techniques.
This book goes way beyond previous works on the Inner Critic. Jay Earley and Bonnie Weiss provide coaches with an entire tool box of tests, forms, ideas, and techniques for setting clients free from the Inner Critic trap.
Gary Goodwin
Creativity Coach, VA
Gives voice to parts of us that were previously unclear.
Looking through the lens of the big picture, Self-Therapy for Your Inner Critic offers a shift in consciousness and world view by guiding us into an integral perspective on the self. The imaginative illustrations provide a wonderful opportunity for us to meet the images we have inside, giving voice to parts of us that were previously unclear or unknown. The book unpacked the theory of IFS and deepened my understanding of the very important area of the inner critic. It got to the core of this judgmental voice and offered ways to meet it from a positive and disidentified perspective. The book flows progressively into positive concepts such as the Inner Champion and the Inner Mentor. There is a transformative and healing power in meeting these inner voices with Bonnie and Jay's guidance.
Barry Robbins
Vice President of ITP International
It's a great addition to the field. Bravo!
This is a really wonderful work! Most all of us have internalized some form of the inner critic, so it's an incredibly important and universal topic that is addressed in this book. As someone who has been working with clients and their inner critics for a number of years, this book provides a level of nuance and understanding about the varieties of inner critics that I haven't seen in other places. Understanding these sub-personalities in depth provides a key for disarming them of their power over us. They also introduce the character of the Inner Champion which can be a strong ally in working with the inner critic - and overcoming it! I know that working with my own inner critic, as well as those of my clients, will be greatly enhanced by my new understanding garnered from this book. It's a great addition to the field. Bravo!
Devaa Haley Mitchell
Founder, Inspiring Women Summit
The practices are skillful and well thought out.
There is a richness and sophistication in Self-Therapy for Your Inner Critic that intrigues me. The practices are skillful and well thought out. I love the core idea of transforming of the inner critic into the inner champion. I had always thought about how to deal with the inner critic but not how to find a different voice. The idea of the Champion shifts your attention from what’s wrong to what’s right. I think this re-orientation is extremely helpful.
Pam Weiss
Founder, Appropriate Response
Great read for professionals and public alike!
What is always so difficult when thinking about your interior life is the inchoate swirling of many feelings, thoughts and sensations. Bonnie and Jay provide a lens for separating this twisted ball of yarn into individual strands that can be followed clearly to a place where we can actually gain a feeling of hope about getting a “handle” on our obstacles,mobilize our resources, and make movement toward change. The concept of Self and the discrimination of seven Inner Critics and their Inner Champions creates a common language for what was vague and unformed. Therapist and client can more easily form a partnership around this shared language forging a clear path to increased self-esteem and self-efficacy.
The premise and promise of this book is easy to grasp and natural to implement! Great read for professionals and public alike!
Andrea S. Gould, Ph.D.
Psychologist, President, Lucid Learning Systems, Inc.
Get Started With Self-Therapy
for Your Inner Critic
You can purchase Self-Therapy for Your Inner Critic in two formats:
You can purchase a physical paperback book from Amazon.com or directly from this website.
Or you can purchase a digital eBook format that you can instantly download to your computer for $9.95.
Click on the "Order Now" button to make your selection.